The bridesmaid wanted to ‘bang her head against the wall’ after an argument over the color of her dress
We’ve all been there, or know someone who has. The bride-to-be chooses the styles and colors of her bridesmaid dress, and you have one in particular because you know it will suit your skin tone so well.
But what if the bride and the rest of the wedding party just copy your messages asking to know what color dress to buy?
Yeah, we’d be bored too.
This is what a furious bridesmaid claims happened to her and she shared it all in a recent Reddit post.
She wrote, “I am currently in medical school and have been living across the country since my brother/family. I was surprised when his fiancée asked me to be a bridesmaid because I barely know her, but she wants to have all the siblings at the wedding.
Getty Images/Tetra images RF)
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“I specified that their wedding was during my last week of exams, and even if I was able to get accommodation to take my last two exams earlier, I still wouldn’t be able to help much with the planning or being present at things like a bachelorette party/bridal shower.
“She said it was fine, it would be mostly to have an even number of bridesmaids for the groomsmen and for the pictures.
“There is a group chat that was started months ago that I read every other day to get updates on things I needed to do, which was to order a bridesmaid dress. links were sent with three styles to choose from and we would update on the colors later.
“So a few weeks go by and I ask what color to order, the bride says she’s still thinking about it. A few more weeks go by and she’s still thinking…then a few more weeks. You got the idea.
“Now it’s to the point that if I don’t order this dress in a few days, it won’t be there in time. So I ask Saturday what color. No response in group chat for me.
“I asked again yesterday what color should I order? Then I’m inundated with messages blaming me for not having ordered a dress yet, from her sisters and my sister and her. My sister told me called, told me to “gather my bullshit” and “already order a dress” because my lack of preparation is causing the bride intense anxiety because she doesn’t think my dress will be there in time for the wedding now.
“She texted me this morning, ‘don’t forget to order your dress, I love you’ with smiling and kissing emojis.
“However, no one told me what color! I scoured the group chat for a mention of dress colors or a picture of a dress but only the bridesmaid sent a picture of her dress and I don’t know if she has a special color.
“There are thousands of messages so it’s not easy to find anything. Everyone can meet in person, so I guess the color decision was relayed in person. I can’t tell if I’m deliberately excluded?
“About an hour ago my brother called me begging me to fix things with the bride because she’s freaking out about me. I tried to explain to him and he said he didn’t care, it’s a little lady’s thing, and since I’m not here for anything else it’s the least I can do because the bride thinks I don’t love her because I wouldn’t get anywhere.
“He takes his side. They know I’m in med school and literally have no say in my schedule. And I’m on the other side of the country, 5:30 by plane.
“I’m fed up with them and am considering telling my instructors that the wedding has been moved and that I’ll be taking my exams at the usual time. I’ll have more time to study that way anyway. I didn’t tell anyone in my family that I was considering this. Could I be wrong?
She then provided eager editors with an update on the dress color drama, and it only gets worse…
She wrote: “I called my mom and asked her what color the bridesmaid dresses are, she said lavender. The only color options on the website that I would call lavender are named pearl lilac , periwinkle and orchid purple.
“I texted the bridesmaid (bride’s sister) asking what color of dress and got a long, multi-paragraph lecture about how I hadn’t ordered my dress yet. dress.
“She said she couldn’t remember the name of the shade, but it’s a ‘dusty purple’, then sent a blurry photo of a crumpled order confirmation, the shade name was mulberry.
“On the dress website it is a darker wine/purple color. I told her that and she said to order the lighter dusty violet color.
“I sent him a screenshot with the list of shade names and asked ‘which one of these?’ She said she didn’t know because everyone had ordered their dress so long ago and asked for pictures of the dresses in different shades on the website.
“So I sent screenshots of all the light purple colors. No response for a while, so I called her on the phone, which upset her because it’s past 10 p.m. there- down now. Her response was “listen, I don’t care about your problem with me and my sister, but if you want to stay in good standing with this family, you have to line up your girly ducks.”
“I want to bang my head against a wall!”
“I called my second brother, the one who is not getting married. He said they used to do similar things with him and he feels like the best man (brother of the bride) deliberately gave him the wrong dates for the bachelor party so he would miss it .
“He inadvertently learned of the date change in the morning and when he asked the witness he told him it must have escaped him to tell him. He then joked that he wouldn’t have missed much since he probably won’t be enjoying any of the festivities anyway.
“They made homophobic jokes and comments at him which he ignored, but he thinks they are trying to get him to give up on the wedding. So if we both step back, there will again be an even number of bridesmaids for groomsmen. Only speculation on our coins of course.
People stood up for the bridesmaids, letting her know that she wouldn’t be wrong if she didn’t want to be part of the wedding.
One wrote: “Holy shit the update is crazy. This bride and her family are wacky. They asked her to be at the wedding. She lives across this fucking country and is dating a medical school, which is hard as shit.
“She told them what her limits were and they can’t even get their ass fucked to take a fucking picture of one of their stupid a**ed, ugly will never wear it again dress that probably costs a ton of money so she knows what one to order.
“On top of that they’re now lecturing her and acting like she’s been begging to be in this wedding s**tshow and they’ve bent over backwards to accommodate her when all she’s asked for is c WHAT IS THE SCARY COLOR OF THE DRESS YOU WANT ME TO WEAR.
“That’s literally the easiest question to answer. I would give up, especially after hearing what they did to his brother and homophobia. F**k that zilla and his brother and OP’s brother too.
Another fumed: ‘I’m pretty sure they’re deliberately excluding her and her brother. Capture all posts (if any) suggesting different colors for bridesmaid dresses.
“And ask your brother to do the same regarding homophobic dates and comments. Step back from marriage and focus on your OP exams. They are your future. Because believe me, your Future SIL gives nothing away about you and quietly tries to kick/exclude you from the wedding.
Someone else wrote: “You don’t even need all that. Just tell them you’ve already ordered the dark blue dress and it should be there just in time… I’m sure they’ll be furious at you what color it should be.
What do you think? Let us know in the comments below.